Man it Keeps Getting Worse

Well I’ve been pretty quiet on the blog front lately.  I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want this blog to represent, and how to keep it interesting.  It’s basically become a dumping ground for all the crazy lame shit that happens to me daily.  And as that it has definitely let me blow some steam that I otherwise can’t blow, not having a sympathetic live ear to fill.

But I wanted this blog to be a sort of guide to coming of age in geography- and hip-obsessed NY.  With plenty of funny depressing shit, but also some useful crap and some pictures and stuff to keep it interesting.  I had planned to make a logo out of the bridge i live under, and enhance my stories with images.

Unfortunately it’s been nothing but crap crap crap lately.  All the bosses at my job have been asked to retire and one’s even going to jail.  My union prescription plan won’t cover my acid reflux meds anymore because i’m too healthy (once i get the cancer they will let me have them)., also I keep getting stood up by friends and girls.  What’s the word for a member of the opposite sex who could maybe be your friend or maybe she’s interested in romance but it remains ambiguous?  Someone needs to come up with one.  Because they have been seriously canceling shit.

Last weekend I had 4 last-minute cancelations! FOUR! And living far away, it takes a lot to get things all coordinated and shit.  A last minute bail generally means I’m already there because I have to leave an hour and 30 in advance.  And here’s where having paperback books that actually fit in your pocket becomes the most important thing in the world.  One can always find a place to park it and read.

Kentucky Derby is coming up.  I have to find a party/bar that i wouldn’t mind being alone at the whole time.  It’s my new rule: never sign up for something unless I would be fine doing it alone, because chances are I will be.

Give it a Rest

I think I’m going to go ahead and give in to my hermit tendencies now.  I may go so far as to drop my facebook account.  I had a particularly frustrating day.  I have basically instituted a policy of accepting every invitation i get from everyone.  I expected this to result in more socializing and maybe even more good times.

Instead it’s just a sack of disappointing.  Today was a prime example.  A girl I met invited me to Prospect Park to hang out with her and some friends.  When I asked where she responded that I should call her when I get there and she’d tell me where they were.  I went.  I called.  She was at home.  Ok. Fine. The park was really nice and no big deal being stuck there alone because I had a book, the sun, the breeze, and hundreds of people enjoying themselves.

Then, I went to a birthday bbq for a friend (acquaintance).  I grabbed a six pack on the way.  When I got to the address, no-one answered the buzzer, the friend didn’t respond to calls or texts.  I went back home carrying the beer the whole hour 15 it took.

I have a large stack of old pictures and old letters here from my childhood home that I rescued from storage recently.  I think I will post some of the letters here on the blog.  They are really something else.  In the meantime I’m gonna wallow in memories and nostalgia.  They should keep me occupied on the brief times when I want company.  Some of the letters are really awesome.  There are quite a few letters wondering why I’ve stopped responding.  I have a lot of bad karma built up if these letters are any indication.

Quick question:  If you were in a band 12 years ago, found some pictures, and posted them to facebook, would you be upset if your bass player and former best friend untagged himself from them?

Comments. Addenda

Ok, first and foremost.  Comments.  If you are reading this blog, let me know you exist by chiming in or saying howdy.  In the future I’ll try to create some discussion worthy posts, with questions and such.  Or don’t comment.  But it could be fun.  You can do it completely anonymously.  No need to enter any private info, just put a nickname and you can post!  Sweet, i know.  Click it NOW!

The juicy bits: I closed my okcupid account.  Ok I just disabled it this time (yes, I have been here before).  Only this time, instead of it being like I’m fleeing from the crush of psychotic and mediocre girls desperately clamoring to slice my skin off and wear it as a hipster-suit, it’s a more reasoned and deliberate flight.  I have some very convincing reasons (to me) for why online dating will never work for me as more than a place to meet friends who I might possibly sleep with.  Except I seem to not be interested in that at all.  Basically, the process of browsing through potential matches and trying out some and ditching others is too much like shopping online.  It sucks out the excitement of real life.  Plus I was addicted to the constant, mild ego boost.

Also, I have purchased two badges to the northside festival, and I suggest you check it out if you want your hipster friends to like you.  I will like you even if you don’t.  Too lazy? It’s like if some hipsters in Brooklyn woke up and realized that all the bands that make other festivals hop actually LIVE HERE.  So they all ALL are booked and playing in June in the hipster triangle.  I’m just hoping I find someone to share the extra badge with, but I’m sure this time I’ll be able to sell it.

Lastly, check out the Leila (pronounced Lila) texts blog here. It’s mildly funny. The concept is that this girl gets every text on Verizon addressed to “Leila”. Which apparently Verizon lets you text to a name… who knew?  I’ve met this girl and she’s hilarious.  The hilarity doesn’t quite come across on the screen, but it’s still fun.

The Hipster Has Horse Ears

So one of the stories/fables that I heard as a kid which sticks in my brain these days and has always held a certain fascination is the one with the line “the prince has horse ears”… as a recurring refrain? maybe it’s the title?  Here’s where wikipedia could ruin the romantically blurred fog of my memories and shine some clarifying light on the question.  So I’m gonna not go there.

The story goes that in some kingdom, there’s a prince who’s always got a hat on, or long hair, or both.  He is befriended by someone (maybe a barber) who gains his trust and this prince shares a serious secret.  His hair or hat or crown is hiding the fact that his ears are horsey.  Like he has hairy Spock ears.  And this new friend swears to keep the secret.  Except that it starts eating at him and eating at him.  He’s basically about to burst with this hidden knowledge, but he is very loyal and trustworthy so he fights the urge to spill it, to confide the secret in some third party.  But he can’t take it, and has to tell, so he goes out into a field of reeds and whispers “the prince has horse ears”.

And well, it bites him in the ass.  Somehow the reeds hold the sentence and i can’t remember how (maybe a flute made of the reeds), but they release their secret in the presence of a gathered audience, revealing it at the worst possible time to the worst possible crowd that this guy is a freak.

I feel like the internet is that field of reeds.  There’s no way to keep things a secret in it, but you really want to believe you can.  And that’s too bad, because there’s basically no way to spill the beans in a healthy yet confidential way.  I suppose that postcard thing, postsecret, and others like it are the closest thing.

I have some doozies I’d like to.  Is this part of growing up? Keeping painful secrets forever and from everyone? Because it sucks worse than almost anything.